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| User: | celestialblue (808570) 
Celestial Blue
Shoot for the moon...even if you fall short, you'll land amongst the stars...
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| Website: | Seraph Graphics |
| Location: | Benton, Louisiana, United States |
| E-mail: | t_oswalt@bellsouth.net
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LJ Talk:
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| celestialblue | @ | livejournal.com (Jabber) |
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| AOL IM: |  silverpheesh (Add Buddy, Send Message) |
| ICQ UIN: |  19546190 (User Profile) |
| Yahoo! ID: |  xtremeangel_la (Add User, Send Message) |
| MSN Username: | |
| Bio: |
Look deep into her soul, and all that you'll find
is a darkness overwhelming, flooding her mind.
Tonya was the name given to me at birth. Tonya Michelle. But it's not who I am, not who I want to be, or who I'm meant to become. It doesn't fit me at all, it's uncomfortable to the nerves of my spirit.
I want a name that’s comfortable. Carefree. Loved. A name that's somewhat odd, but enjoyable. Celestial Blue. Pheesh. Something I can relate to, that fits the inner me, something that is me.
But enough of that. You want to know about me, right? The details. The sadness and pain in my life, so you can compare, connect, relate. Maybe that's how one makes friends, forms connections. And yet, I long for individuality, something that sets me apart.
I do want friends though, I long for those as well. So for that purpose, I shall tell you the basics. I love nature. I'm married and want children. I'm antisocial and really shy, until I get to know someone. Getting me to really open up though, that’s the trick. I'm emotional, and yes, at times a bit dramatic. My list of hobbies consists of a myriad of things, including reading, writing, photography, movies, and rpgs. I love most animals, and I especially think rats are adorable.
Still interested?
That's great. But I thought you wanted to see the real me? To get to know me as I know myself?
I'm intuitive, creative, and a dreamer. I'm a pisces, through and through. I feel a strong connection with nature, and I'm most at home in a forest, surrounded by trees and the sounds of animals. Or standing outside, barefoot in the grass, with rain falling down on me. Rain, trees...nature...those are the things that help keep me centered, in an otherwise unstable world.
I'm alone. Sure, I've got family and friends. They even say they love me, but I don't see why. I am angry, temperamental, and afraid. I push and pull at people, especially those I care about, with motives unknown even to myself. I'm in pain, though I try my best to avoid it.
Most of the time, I feel disconnected from the rest of the world. I think I would do just fine living out in the country, just me, my husband, and our pets, separated from the rest of civilization. And yet, I have an empathic nature towards people, and I can sense their emotions. I have little control over that side of me though, and the moods of those around me often influence my own mood, both in happiness and sadness, excitement and frustration.
I see beauty in everything, and it captivates me...but I fail to recognize any in myself. I am utterly, undeniably flawed. I am a shadow on the wall, invisible to most, though a lot of the time that’s just the way I like it. But sometimes, I wish someone would notice me, smile, and call out to me. My true self is deeply hidden from all, except for those who know me best, the very few that I've let in. I am like the moon, illuminated only by the rays of others, but longing to strike out on my own. To find the inner light within myself, and outshine even the sun during the darkest eclipse. But, I also know that it's a forlorn, unfulfillable desire. See? I refuse to even call it hope.
It's not that I don't see good things in myself. But there is nothing special about me. Nothing unique. Nothing that catches the eye of people, making them stop and smile, and remember me. That’s what I really desire, what I need...to be something different, something special.
After all, in the end, if you're not something special, aren't you really nothing at all?
(Bio written by myself and ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) dagain. Much thanks goes to her.)
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Regarding graphic requests: Please do not make any requests here at my personal journal. If you are interested in blinkies, icons, or other graphics that I may make, please join ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) seraph_graphics where I am a maker, along with two of my dearest friends. Thanks! |
 Layout by gawariel_design.
User Info header and divider headers made by me.
Icons are credited in icon keyword/comments.
Credit for all blinkies and other graphics can be found here, and by hovering over the graphic.
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| Memories:: | 43 entries |
| Interests: | 115: 80's movies, accents, alan rickman, alice in wonderland, alyson hannigan, american idol, amy brown, amy dumas, animals, anne rice, astrology, astronomy, autumn, blue, books, bookstores, borderline personality disorder, bowling for soup, bpd, buffy the vampire slayer, candles, carebears, castles, celtic, cemetaries, chicken, chicken spaghetti, computers, dachshunds, demon dogs, dragons, dreams, eeyore, elements, eliza dushku, fantasy, fantasy art, final fantasy games, forests, goddess, green, harry potter, hobbits, icons, ireland, irish, james marsters, jay and silent bob, jedi mind tricks, jessica galbreth, jonathon earl bowser, kevin smith, labyrinth, leprechauns, lex luther, lightning, live, lord of the rings, lost, magic, mayfair witches, mermaids, metallica, mythology, nati, nature, new orleans, night, nightcrawler, nightwish, otters, pagan, pbem, photography, pickles, pirates, rabbits, rain, rats, reading, rpgs, sea otters, seals, silver, smallville, smurfs, snow, spike, squirrels, stars, stephanie pui-mun law, stonehenge, storms, taco bell, tarot, that 70's show, the breakfast club, the moon, thunderstorms, tna, tortoises, turtles, twizzlers, video games, view askew, water, weird al, wicca, willow, witch, witchcraft, witches, wrestling, writing, wwe |
| Schools: | Benton High School - Benton, LA (1994 - 1998)
Ashford University - Clinton, IA (2008 - present)
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| Friends: | | 64: | _hushed_art, aragwen, astro_kitten, beyondstars, blakmagjick, bloody_artist, cardinalred, celestialwillow, chibicloud, ckir, colorfilter, cookiegirlie, dagain, dagain_writing, desperatehopes, deteriorative, fallinstar, finding_her, frozen_dream, gazzyh, hollowfyre, iamfuckinggreat, ian_mc, iconseeyou, inediblebulk, infinite_icons, innocencefades, ivorytowers, jacqui, kandysmindfreak, kraftdinnermom, lillahdragen, lillianvee, lone_district, lou_zer, lunar__spawn, lunarrastarr, mellusions, merlintkd, moocards, moonrakerbeads, msanborn, musical_rocko, nati_in_the_sky, omg_iconz_, only_the_sex, onthaedge, pensieve_icons, petalsofash, quinx98, refinne, ruinouscreation, sammified, sashar80, sassay80, skyhawk, stevietee, sweetkisses13, sylverwind, the_olga, tw_babiez, uawildcatgrl, veuve_norie, whitestar_alpha | | 128: | 100x100_brushes, _lunargraphics_, _premadelayouts, _skin_deep_, _thepants, alien_examples, angelic_gallery, ashen_memories, autumnknights, autumns_gallery, bipagan_sistahs, blinkees, blinkie_blanks, blinkie_contest, blinkie_dreams, blinkie_help, blinkie_idol, blinkie_info, blinkie_store, blinkierequests, blinkieshare, bshare_gallery, care_2_share, catch_a_soul, cats_meow_icons, chemicalanthem, cherrystyle, chicksgallery, cookie_credits, cressidaslayout, daiinty_info, dark_figments, dearstars, design_kitten, divine_designs, dreamyicons, elegants, elen_gallery, elite_blinkies, ephemere_icons, eternalcreation, ever_curious, faded_graphics, fluidic_icons, frankthecomic, freebie_ave, freelayouts, fun_blinkies, gardening, gawariel_design, gothblinkies, graphic_sphynx, growing_indoors, guidinglight, harmonys_pixels, heavenly_icons, hexentraum, hushed_haven, hushstar, icon_extras, icon_goddess, icon_tutorial, icons_r_us, iconxbrothel, idablinkie, innocent_grafix, jens__graphics, jewls_graphics, jg_vineyard, jms_examples, juicy_grapes, kandys_land, layouts_by_me, lecollage, leftshoes, legendary_icons, lj_biz, lj_nifty, loveharmony, lush_examples, lushicons, magi_graphics, mechapenguin, midnight_blink, moonshadow_ljs, more_blinkies, news, obsessiveicons, oicontests, olsgallery, otter_blinkies, ownthesunshine, paidmembers, peacock_jade, pixel_bee, pixelslikewhoa, pixys_pretties, polarisgraphics, premade_ljs, ps7_tutorials, rattie_adoption, rattielovers, ratties, relativus_lima, renees_gallery, rubyangel_lbms, s2smoothsailing, sassy_graphxs, sayclub_gallery, seraph_graphics, seraphgraphics, serenity_pixels, snazztastical, solaris_designs, solaris_gallery, spriinks, syanas_gallery, taffies, thebrenljidol, thefulcrum, thetissuebox, tinyblinks, unicorngallery, unicornglade, vibrant____, viewaskew, whisperinicons, wwe |  | 2: | myboringasslife, vgc |
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| Mutual Friends: | 53: aragwen, astro_kitten, beyondstars, blakmagjick, bloody_artist, cardinalred, celestialwillow, ckir, dagain, dagain_writing, desperatehopes, deteriorative, fallinstar, finding_her, frozen_dream, gazzyh, hollowfyre, iamfuckinggreat, ian_mc, inediblebulk, innocencefades, ivorytowers, jacqui, kandysmindfreak, kraftdinnermom, lillahdragen, lillianvee, lone_district, lou_zer, lunarrastarr, mellusions, merlintkd, moonrakerbeads, msanborn, musical_rocko, nati_in_the_sky, only_the_sex, onthaedge, pensieve_icons, petalsofash, quinx98, refinne, sammified, sashar80, sassay80, skyhawk, stevietee, sweetkisses13, sylverwind, the_olga, uawildcatgrl, veuve_norie, whitestar_alpha |
| Also Friend of: | 20: _glitterdoll, baham, bellantri, cascadingdesire, cathain_magi, ddrcraze, early_autumn, gothiclibra, journalpretties, mental_thatone, nefithilwen, onlyinyourmind, ozzie12, pizza_guy, sailorerison, schalyicon, starzgrrrl, sweetestcredits, viintage__, xbroken_iconsx |
| Member of: | 113: _premadelayouts, _skin_deep_, _thepants, alien_examples, angelic_gallery, ashen_memories, autumnknights, bipagan_sistahs, blinkees, blinkie_blanks, blinkie_contest, blinkie_dreams, blinkie_help, blinkie_idol, blinkie_info, blinkie_store, blinkierequests, blinkieshare, borderline, bpdisorder, bshare_gallery, care_2_share, catch_a_soul, cats_meow_icons, cblue_icons, celestialstorms, chemicalanthem, cherrystyle, cookie_credits, cressidaslayout, dark_figments, dearstars, divine_designs, dreamyicons, elegants, elen_gallery, ephemere_icons, eternalcreation, ever_curious, faded_graphics, fluidic_icons, frankthecomic, freebie_ave, freelayouts, fun_blinkies, gardening, gawariel_design, gothblinkies, graphic_sphynx, growing_indoors, guidinglight, harmonys_pixels, heavenly_icons, hexentraum, hushed_haven, hushstar, icon_goddess, iconxbrothel, idablinkie, innocent_grafix, jens__graphics, jewls_graphics, jg_vineyard, jms_examples, juicy_grapes, kandys_land, layouts_by_me, lecollage, legendary_icons, ljs2layouts, loveharmony, lushicons, magi_graphics, midnight_blink, moonshadow_ljs, more_blinkies, obsessiveicons, oicontests, olsgallery, otter_blinkies, paidmembers, pixel_bee, pixelslikewhoa, pixys_pretties, polarisgraphics, premade_ljs, ps7_tutorials, rattie_adoption, rattielovers, ratties, renees_gallery, rubyangel_lbms, s2_bloggish, s2bloggish, s2smoothsailing, sassy_graphxs, sayclub_gallery, seraph_graphics, seraphgraphics, serenity_pixels, snazztastical, solaris_designs, spriinks, stuffmadeforme, syanas_gallery, taffies, thebrenljidol, thetissuebox, tinyblinks, vibrant____, viewaskew, wwe, ysi_leftovers |
| Account type: | Paid Account |
